Friday, January 22, 2010
I have heard wonderful things about Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. I received a complimentary copy from Thomas Nelson to review several months ago and started reading right away, hungry to know more about God’s design for the marriage relationship.
The book is based around Ephesians 5:33 – a wonderful verse about the roles of husbands and wives – giving love and respect, respectively, if you will!
Unfortunately, something tripped me up. My reading stalled quickly. That "thing" was an emphasis on critical wives. I do not disagree this is a major problem in our society. However, from my perspective – and my husband would agree – my disrespect towards him is NEVER verbal. And this is where I had a hard time relating with the book. I put it down for a while.
Recently, I picked it up again, asking God to reveal truths beyond the nagging wife scenario. Although still slow going, I was able to read the book, replacing the verbal disrespect with my own acts of disrespect and their effects on our marriage. God spoke to me in this way through the book.
Dr. Eggerichs hits the nail on the head with his “Crazy Cycle” described in the book and I think the concept could relate to so many hurting marriages – whether the disrespect and lack of love is in word or deed.
Love and Respect is fairly repetitive and tends to talk more about the husband's need for respect than the wife's need for love, but that may be what some need to really get the message of how important BOTH are to a marriage.